One of the biggest struggles we had was the relationship between my then just turned 3 year old Jay and Kena who was about to be 2. They are roughly 13 months a part and toddlers. I repeat toddlers, terrible 2's and 3's at once and then repeat one more year. They were oil and water in the beginning, as Jay's sole mission when he woke up was to see how many times he could make Kena cry. Disciplining was exhausting, but persistence paid off.
Now a year later they have learned that having a playmate at home close in age has its advantages. They pretty much like the same things - cartoons, toys, games, etc. They still have their moments, but compared to where we were last year, it is a TON better. I see their age being a huge advantage in school, mainly middle and high school.
So, I wrote a poem about it through the eyes of my son that may help some of you in the same situation or about to be in the same situation, adopted or not.
One sibling, two siblings, three siblings……four?
One sibling, two siblings, three siblings….four? How will mommy share her love with one more?
This new girl is different, looks nothing like us, from a country and continent we’ve never discussed.
Her skin and eyes are brown and ours are peachy and blue, her hair feels soft like a pillow that is new.
She is very quiet at first checking everything out, stays close to mommy with scared looks and soft pouts.
She eats super fast as if it won’t last and cries when she’s done which is really no fun.
Our toys are no good unless it’s taking baby for a stroll, she would rather dance to music to help soothe her soul.
New places and people create quite a stir unless mommy is there to make her feel secure.
But wait….I don’t like all this extra attention this new arrival gets, why did they bring someone home who throws so many fits?
Mommy and daddy told me God put her in a special place in their hearts, that they were needed to take 1 child of many millions off the orphan charts. You see, God first adopted all of us to give hope and eternal life with Him. If we don’t share that hope with others then those lost don't win. By giving my sister a family who loves her and teaches her about Jesus, it’s the kind of work for God that is satisfying and pleases.
I guess I would also be sad if I had no mom or dad. No one to say a prayer with, tuck me in, and kiss me good night. No one to pick me up from a fall and hold me so tight.
A couple months have gone by and she seems to be more settled, being playful and silly and loves to be tickled.
I realized I was just being selfish, wanting mommy all for me and nobody else’s.
Another playmate in the house isn’t so bad, especially when we play hide n seek and tag.
No matter the difference or how many of us there are, I know God loves her, me, and everyone near or far.
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